myTamilDate.com has been the most trusted dating community for single Tamils around the world for close to a decade! It’s the premiere dating platform for diaspora Tamils and has the largest membership base in Canada, USA, UK & more. You can join the community for free at www.myTamilDate.com.
Engaged couple Suji & Sinthu are our latest success story, among many. Their journey is a heartwarming example of fate, timing and going after what you want!
Tell us a bit about yourself.
Suji: I am 30 years old, born and raised in Toronto and I am a public relations professional. Sports is my biggest passion - whether it’s watching or playing sports, nothing makes me happier. I’m also a history buff and love to spend time with my family and friends.
Sinthu: I am 29 years old and currently live in Mississauga. I work as a Human Resources Manager for a retail company. During my free time, I enjoy watching sports, particularly the Toronto Blue Jays. Go Jays Go! :) When I’m not watching sports, I enjoy travelling and spending time creating memories with my family and friends!
When did you first join myTamilDate.com? What made you want to join?
Suji: I joined MyTamilDate.com four years ago after a friend had recommended that I give it a shot. Online dating seemed like the new way to find love and being with a Tamil woman is what I’ve always wanted, so MTD seemed like a perfect platform to try out.
Sinthu: Recognizing that meeting new people had transitioned to online platforms, it took some time to work up the courage to welcome and embrace this experience. I ultimately did and joined MTD back in early 2018.
So, who messaged first?
Suji: I bought the paid membership component for the website in July 2018 and messaged Sinthu on the same day. She responded about 30 minutes later!
What first attracted you to the other person and made you want to meet in person?
Suji: Along with having similar interests, I found Sinthu to be very funny. It just seemed like we clicked and I had a smile on my face everytime she messaged. I wanted to meet in person to get to know more about her.
Sinthu: We had common interests and hobbies - sports of course! From our first interaction on MTD, it became evident as to why we both clicked so quickly. We were able to make conversation about anything and everything so seamlessly. The more we talked, the more obvious it became that we had to meet in person!
From messaging to the first date, how much time passed?
We met four days after messaging for the first time. We live 15 mins away from each other, so setting up a time to meet was pretty easy!
Where did you go for your first date and how was it?
Funny story! Suji suggested that we go bowling for our first date. When we arrived at the bowling alley, Suji noticed a sign on the entrance door indicating that the bowling alley was closed as it was hosting a private bowling league for the night. In that moment, you could tell Suji was a tad bit embarrassed. I noticed a nearby coffee shop and suggested going to it so we could chat and get to know each other some more. Boy, am I glad I had suggested it, as we were probably at the coffee shop for hours just chatting away till it was about to close! I was rather comfortable with him as Suji got to see glimpses of my silly nature and thankfully, it didn’t scare him off!
Some studies say that within 30 seconds of meeting a new person, we can gauge attraction. Was that true for you?
Suji: I would definitely agree with this. I felt an instant spark once Sinthu and I started to message each other. It definitely takes some time to figure out if they are “the one”, but you can immediately be attracted to a certain person.
Sinthu: Not necessarily. While our conversations flowed very easily, it was after we initially met and the more and more we spoke and interacted with one another that the attraction grew for me.
When did you realize that this was your ‘special someone’ and you could see yourself spending the rest of your life with them? How do you feel about the saying ‘when you know, you know’?
Suji: Within a couple months of dating, she showed me how caring of a person she can be. Despite all my flaws and quirks, she was always there and helped me out in any way possible. She keeps me on my toes and motivates me to do better in life. She checked all the boxes when it comes to finding a person I’d want to spend the rest of my life with. I agree with “when you know, you know”. It might take some time to figure it out, but when you find someone who has similar values and goals as you, it makes connecting with someone easier.
Sinthu: Although there was a sense of ease with our conversations and Suji had the qualities that I was looking for in a partner, I knew I had met my “special someone” when it became increasingly clear that I could be my true self with all my quirks with no hesitation whatsoever with him. The statement of ‘when you know, you know’ couldn’t be any more true for me. Essentially, a eureka moment had occurred as it became increasingly evident through our relationship that Suji himself is my happy place!
How did your respective families and friends react to the fact you met on a dating site?
Suji: My family and friends were happy that I met someone online. It was definitely surprising to my parents, but they quickly realized that meeting people using a dating site is the new norm.
Sinthu: My family and friends didn’t react any differently when I had mentioned that I had met Suji on a dating site, as I had other family members and friends who had met their respective partners online.
How was the proposal?
The proposal was everything and more! As part of his ruse leading up to the proposal, Suji asked me to come by his place to see his grandmother. As we were on his way to his place, Suji made a pit stop at a park that we frequented as he claimed his grandmother wasn’t yet at his place and figured we can hang out for a bit until she made her way to his place. How sneaky is he? We walked around and found our way at the bench that we would always sit at when we came to the park. On the bench were “Marry Me” blocks and beside the bench, was a gorgeous intimate picnic setup! Suji proposed right then and there and after the proposal, he had me turn around and to my pleasant surprise, my family and friends were present as they had helped Suji with the planning of the proposal! Given the COVID-19 pandemic, we haven’t quite figured out the logistics of the big day as of yet but we are looking forward to spending the rest of our lives together!
What advice would you give to those looking for love but finding it difficult to meet someone?
Suji: Aside from figuring out what you want in your partner, you need to step out of your comfort zone. There are going to be plenty of highs and lows in the process. You have to be patient and use everything as a learning experience prior to finding your perfect match.
Sinthu: It’s important to understand that meeting someone and ultimately finding love can take time. Even though it can be difficult to meet someone, it’s important to remind yourself that the amount of time it takes is not a reflection of yourself. It’s imperative to be patient but also be open and not to force yourself into something that makes you uncomfortable. While it may be difficult to meet someone, one should never settle after just the first few dates. You should be able to be comfortable in your own skin and be your true self with your special someone. While it can be a frustrating process at times, it is all worth it when you do find love in the end! Ultimately, remember to be your true self, be willing to expand your horizons and make an effort to put yourself out there!
What factor would you say patience played in your journey of finding love?
Suji: I’ve realized that I had to be patient before figuring out if I’ve found the right person for me. When things are going well at the start, you just have this urge to rush into a relationship. Learning more about the person and knowing what they want in life are things that will take some time.
Sinthu: Finding love can be a journey of many ups and downs. When finding love, it is important to first develop patience with yourself which can in turn affect one’s ability to be patient with others. Finding love can be frustrating but it’s important not to rush the process or settle as it can take many encounters, dates and opportunities before finding love. In order to build a future with someone, one of the many foundations of a relationship is that of patience. It goes to show that you must value yourself and your partner to help build the foundation of your relationship together.
“Finding the right person to spend your life with is a big decision that could dramatically alter the trajectory of your life. It’s similar to a career, where any one job interview that goes well could change your life. So approach online dating as intentionally and methodically as you would finding your dream job.” Agree or disagree?
Suji: I would agree with this approach as both online dating and job interviews involve a lot of preparation and stressful days. Whether it’s your profile or resume, you’d want to be able to set yourself apart by putting the necessary effort which takes time, since these decisions can lead to life changing events.
Sinthu: For myself, I would agree but I think it also depends on where one is in their life journey. With online dating, it’s important to put the necessary effort and attention into your dating profile and the subsequent conversations that can follow. While it can be a daunting task like sitting through a job interview, putting the necessary effort when approaching online dating can potentially open the door to your happily ever after! At the same time, it’s also important to understand that not everyone may approach online dating the same way as you as everyone’s timeline and priorities are different.
Even though online dating is the most effective and popular way to get married these days, some people in the Tamil community still find it to be a taboo. What would you say to them?
Suji: Online dating shouldn’t be considered a taboo anymore within the Tamil community and the general public. Our parents and the previous generations have looked at arranged marriages as the ideal way to get married as they believe it helps you find the right person. With online dating, you’ve an opportunity to expand on your choices and see what works best for you. To the people who believe online dating is a taboo, I’d say that the mindset of young Tamils has changed and this will be the new norm. Websites such as MyTamilDate.com provide us an opportunity to connect with Tamils across the globe and learn about new lifestyles and cultures. Who knows, your soulmate might be right on the other side of the ocean or right under your nose and waiting for you to purchase a myTamilDate.com membership to message them :)
Sinthu: While I personally do not view online dating as a taboo, I myself hesitated with the idea of online dating as it was different from the traditional methods of meeting someone. However, in the same breath, I am more of an introvert so meeting people in person was something that I experienced difficulty with at times. Between my personality, hearing many success stories about online dating, and personally recognizing that it was a popular method to meet new people; the initial hesitation of trying online dating eventually disappeared. Even now, as we grow accustomed to living through a global pandemic, online dating is essentially one of the few methods to meet someone right now too.
Overall, times are changing and while change can be a scary thing, it’s okay to embrace it! There are so many aspects of life that can now be found online, so why should dating be viewed any differently? At the end of the day, what matters is celebrating happiness and love, not the method used to find that love. Finding the person to spend your life with is not easy, so why should one limit their opportunities to meet someone in a society that can be impacted by technology, social media and online platforms.
Despite my initial hesitations, I am forever grateful for taking the plunge with online dating. Had I not joined myTamilDate.com, I would have never met my forever person!
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