If you’ve had a traditional upbringing by Tamil parents, regardless of which part of the world you’re from, the path you were expected to take might look a bit like this:
Study very, very hard. Excel at school. Keep socializing to a minimum. Don’t you dare think about dating.
Ages 19- your early 20’s
Study very, very hard. Excel at college/university. Keep socializing to a minimum. Don’t you dare think about dating.
Early 20’s- Mid 20’s
Land a great job (ideally something in STEM like an engineer). Keep socializing to a minimum. Start thinking about getting married, buying a house and having kids but no dating.
Mid 20’s- full adult status
Get married! Buy a house! Have kids. ASAP.
As you can see, there are some gaps in these expectations. How does one avoid dating completely and then jump right into marriage, house and kids pretty much overnight? We asked TC readers how they found love under these expectations and this is what they had to say.
Online dating seems to be the top way for single Tamils to find relationships, followed by their personal network (arranged marriages are still very popular). This is not very surprising as online dating is becoming more and more accepted in the South Asian community as young people balance busy lifestyles and take control of their love life- moving away from family interference.
This is evidenced by the growing number of people between 25-35 from countries such as Canada, America and the UK who are finding relationships and marriage through sites like myTamilDate.com (a TC affiliated site). In one example, a female UK doctor in her late 20’s met a Canadian male professional in his late 20’s through myTamilDate, leading to an engagement and an eventual move to Canada. The parents were involved only after the couple decided they wanted to get married.
So, while your dating life may have been put on hold longer than your non-Tamil peers, if finding love is important to you- there are plenty of options, even intercontinental ones.