Lavanya, 27, is a healthcare professional. Her interests include personal growth, weight training and spending time with family and friends.
Vitharan, 28, is an educator and social worker. He enjoys traveling, reading and practicing yoga.
Their first date: We spent the entire day together, roaming the busy streets downtown, listening to live music at an outdoor concert and watching fireworks.
This is their myTamilDate Love Story!
Some studies say that within 30 seconds of meeting a new person, we can gauge attraction. Was that true for you?
Lavanya*: No. I was somewhat attracted to him but this grew immensely with every encounter and every conversation we had.
Vitharan*: Definitely true.
When did you realize that this was your ‘special someone’ and you could see yourself spending the rest of your life with them? How do you feel about the saying ‘when you know, you know’?
Lavanya: I realized that he was my special someone when I felt I could be myself around him. I wasn’t afraid to be judged. He accepted me entirely and loved me for who I was. There was definitely a sense of security and comfort that I felt with him.
Vitharan: It took a few dates, and a lot of conversations, but something kept me intrigued and yes, “when you know, you know” definitely applies.
How did your respective families and friends react to the fact you met on a dating site?
Lavanya: My parents and siblings knew from day one where I met him. They actually encouraged me to join myTamildate.com to meet a potential partner. I was quite open about it with immediate family and friends. I am so grateful to have had such a strong support system rooting for me every step of the way.
Vitharan: A little surprised, but a lot of my friends and family members are using dating apps and I believe online dating is growing. I was introduced to online dating by my cousin who told me about myTamilDate.com. I was shy at first and had never dated before, so I tried it and it worked!
How was the proposal?
Lavanya: It was sweet, simple and quite a surprise. He shocked me with a proposal right before God at a church.
Vitharan: I proposed after spending the day with her family. We decided to go to church together, just the two of us. I had bought the ring and kept it in my wallet for a few days, not knowing when would be a perfect time to propose. We climbed the mountain of stairs to light a glass candle and, at that moment, I felt it was the perfect time to pop the question. What better witness than God right? Well she said “Yes” and that was the beginning of the next chapter in our lives.
What advice would you give to those looking for love but finding it difficult to meet someone?
Lavanya: Love yourself inside and out! Become the best version of yourself and the universe will open doors to bring you your match. Be open to different opportunities. Take chances and know that no matter what happens, it will be an experience you can only grow from!
Vitharan: Online dating shouldn’t be seen as a taboo. I would say be patient, keep looking and don't settle for just anyone. Make sure you go on multiple dates and have lots of conversations with the person. Just like you don’t settle for the first car, phone or house that you see, do your due diligence and find the ‘one’ - the right person you know you want to be with for the rest of your life.
Even though online dating is the most effective and popular way to get married these days, some people in the Tamil community still find it to be a taboo. What would you say to them?
Lavanya: I felt the same way. I always hoped to meet someone through acquaintances or through a Tamil get together. But being limited to the number of single Tamil men I would encounter on a regular basis, online dating seemed to be a reasonable option for me. I am so grateful for myTamilDate.com. Without this platform, I would have probably never met Vitharan. The longer I was on the dating site, the more I felt comfortable about it. It goes without saying, there is a growing number of Tamil men and women using online dating platforms, who refrain from talking about it for fear of being judged. Online dating has brought me my soulmate and I believe it can for many others. It’s so important for couples like us to talk about it, because in this day and age, myTamildate.com is a great platform to meet people you likely would never have crossed paths with otherwise. With time, I believe the Tamil community will learn to accept it as a norm.
Vitharan: We came from a generation of parents and family members who never even got to spend much time with their partners before they married. Most of the older generation found their spouses through arranged marriages and this continues to be true today. Online dating shouldn’t be seen as taboo, as it is just one of many methods of meeting a potential partner. Online dating websites have a huge reach, across cities and countries, while being a safe and secure way of finding a potential life partner that you can first extensively vet to see if you have similar values and interests before meeting in person. We live in a society where everyone is on a screen (phones/computers) already, so online dating is just a natural extension of that behaviour. Be patient...good things come to those who wait. I will forever be grateful to myTamilDate.com for bringing Lavanya into my life.
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*Real names changed for privacy.