Is Something Missing? How to Find True Happiness


The funny thing about us humans is that regardless of what we have, we’ll always want more. Whether it’s a bigger house, a newer car or a higher paying job, it’s human nature to want more. As a result, most of us are often never fully satisfied with our lives.

So you have to ask yourself – is something truly missing? Sure, the bigger house or the nicer car would be nice. But is it truly something that would fill an empty void in your life? The simple answer would be no, because half of the material objects we buy are simply to fill a void in other aspects of our lives. We don’t need these things. But we indulge in them anyway because that temporary illusion of happiness distracts us from our underlying problems.

Our society tricks us into believing that there is a cookie-cutter formula for creating an ideal life. Finish school. Find a job. Get married. Not that there is anything wrong with that formula. But it is surely not for everyone.

We have all become so afraid to be alone for long periods of time because we are terrified of being labeled as damaged goods. Not to mention being annoyed by people who ask when you’re planning to get married at every event you go to, and then receiving judgmental looks for simply shrugging your shoulders.

The truth is we spend so much time trying to live up to unrealistic expectations imposed on us by society that we forget to live for ourselves. We spend so much time trying to collect assets that we forget that companionship cannot be thought of as one of those assets. Finding someone to spend your life with is not like finding a job or searching for the perfect house. It is about figuring out who you are, and then finding someone who completes you.

We often buy things out of impulse because we feel like we need them. And that’s fine because we all have our moments of vulnerability. What you need to remember is that a relationship is not one of those things you can just buy and throw away. You can’t let your vulnerabilities dictate that aspect of your life.

I’ve been alone for some time now. I won’t say that I’m happy being alone. But I’m comfortable in my solitude. Being alone does not equate to me being lonely, and it certainly does not equate to me being damaged. Some nights when I’m lost in my thoughts, I feel like there is something missing.

But that doesn’t mean that I should go out and try to fill that empty hole. Instead, I’m focusing on things that would make me a better person and add to my character. With my demanding career and my passion to do something significant with my life, my past relationship took a backseat. I feel that in order for me to truly be happy with someone again, I need to be happy with myself first.

Sometimes you need to be alone. Take that time to read books, travel and reconnect with yourself. Just because a person chooses to be alone does not mean that they’ve given up on love.

So if you ever feel like there’s something missing in your life or you feel alone at odd hours in the night, just remember that you should always cater to yourself before anything else. Do things that make you happy and lifelong happiness will surely follow. Contrary to popular belief, no one will be alone forever.

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Anoojan Vijayasri

Anoojan Vijayasri

I'm an engineer by day and a supehero by night. Some of you may remember me from my glory days as the infamous Boy Wonder, but most of you have probably never even heard of me. When I'm not infront of a computer screen or a camera lens I love to put pen to paper and bleed out my thoughts. I would love to tell you that I'm artistically gifted, but I merely have a tendency to go on and on about anything and everything.

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3 thoughts on “Is Something Missing? How to Find True Happiness

  1. Well
    True happiness comes from within:
    …knowing what your heart wants in this life,
    …having the great feeling being around genuinely caring people,
    …being respected for the person I am, not the graduate degree I
    hold, the car I drive nor the house I live in,
    …going to a wedding, and friends and family talks about the
    areas in my life where I succeeded, not the wedding which is not on the cards
    at this moment!
    Isn’t it human nature, the weak nature, to point out what is missing in one’s
    life instead of praising the successes one is experiencing?
    With this in mind, take a look on your environment (family, friends and
    colleagues), you will be surprised seeing how many weak people this society
    consist of – your life consist of; but I still respect their views/lives,
    because I know God/Universe didn’t bless them with the big heart nor knowledge
    I have.
    PS: One who truly understands himself and what life is about will
    not get a chance to feel loneliness – even when being without a life partner!
    I still want that Aston Martin or Bugatti or both one fine day, not because it
    will make me happy, but because it belongs to my “nice-to-have” list. 🙂

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