How to Overcome Low Self-Esteem

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Do you feel like you are in a perpetual cycle? Don’t worry, I’ve been there and done that. I’m here to tell you that these feelings of low self-worth can be dealt with. Though these tips may not help you, it can show you that only you can define your self-worth, not the world around you.

1. HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF

Many may wonder how can having faith help my self-doubt? When I genuinely started believing I could do it, rather than always assuming I was destined for failure, it felt like 500 pounds were lifted off my shoulders. It is the little things that make a big difference such as smiling when you do well on a quiz, going into exams by giving yourself a pep talk, and most of all trusting that you can do anything because:

“So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.” – Christopher Reeve

If you believe that you can reach the stars and beyond, that self-trust you have within yourself signifies that anything that may be impossible before will become possible now.

2. STOP THE NEGATIVE INNER-SELF

Take one minute and think about how many times you stopped yourself from doing something today: not going to class because you will not get it, changing your clothing because it looked unattractive, looking at others and complaining about how you are not good enough like them. Ladies, we have all done it in our lifetime.

Our inner-self is one of our biggest bullies.

It’s those little voices in your head that whisper soft insults to you and keep reminding you of how unworthy you may be. You will not be able experience new things with this demon of an inner-self.

The moment you feel like you are going to say something negative about yourself, tell yourself “no no no, I am not thinking like this” or pull an elastic band every time you encounter yourself in this predicament. I know it may sound silly to many, but if you spend less time thinking destructive thoughts and more time thinking constructive thoughts, it motivates you to wake up every day and tackle the day headfirst. Rather than listening to your inner critics, listen to your inner Beyoncé – be Fierce.

3. BE OPTIMISTIC

I’ve come to realize that for many women, if they are unable to do something on their first attempt, it causes them to assume they will fail every time. This may not apply to everyone, but I know it does apply to me and I am positive that I am not the only person who feels this way.

This could because we have always been told that women are not capable of doing many things that men are. The whole idea of gender inequality has played heavily on why women tend to have lower self-worth.

The one thing I tell those who feel like this is attempt to handle failure more positively. If you think that you will fail at things outside your comfort zone because you failed at things inside your comfort zone, it makes it hard for you try anything at all.

Understand you are human. Humans make mistakes.

If you are not optimistic about your life and future aspirations, how are you going to be able to be successful? One of my favourite quotes is from Beyonce:

“The reality is: sometimes you lose. And you’re never too good to lose. You’re never too big to lose. You’re never too smart to lose. It happens.”

Success is only achieved through failure. All the failures mean nothing when you accomplish what you set out to do.

Women are extremely critical of their own self because many believe they are not good enough, not smart enough and not perfect enough. We need to realize that we do not live a life to please anyone but ourselves. We need to stop trying to fit into this ideal image of what society claims what and how women are supposed to be.

We are all unique in our own ways and this uniqueness is what defines us. Not one person will be the same as the next person, but that’s what makes our self-worth so empowering. Self-worth is what makes all of us different. We need to all believe we are capable of achieving anything if we put our minds to it.

Success that comes after multiple failures is the best kind of success we can have. If anything, I leave you with this:

“I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world. I run my world.”

Believe in your self-worth. Be fierce because you are fiercer than you think.

xoxo

Editor's Note


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Author

Tusa Sinnthamby

Tusa Sinnthamby

Currently a second year student at the University of Toronto,pursuing a B.Sc. in Psychology. She has been a contributing member of her community from a young age and she pride myself in bringing about change and overall happiness. Currently, she is volunteering with the Distress Helpline and Footprint. Her vision is for one day open her very own clinic and help others through their problems, and make them feel heard. Aside from this, she is someone who promotes equality, peace and making everyone feel apart of a community. A quote she lives by is – I never dreamed about success. I worked for it because nothing worth having comes easy.

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